Recently I realized that I’m a depressive person, maybe it’s a medical condition, maybe it’s just that I grew up in a very negative environment. Anyhow, after two years on trying to face my fears, I think I’ve finally taken a step forward.
To me, succeeding in my career and achieving happiness go hand in hand, the problem is that I’ve always sabotaged myself. Putting this issue aside, I’ve been so scared of not being good at something, that I’ve postponed everything, either that or I haven’t been constant in whatever I do, including this blog. But it’s not as bad as it sounds, I’ve worked very hard on literally reprogramming my attitude towards life and now I can say that I’m finally feeling good, I’m not worried about what people think of me, I’m not worried about getting recognition, I’m not thinking if I’m good or not, I’m just working.
I’m starting to feel free and it couldn’t come in a better time, since now my projects are starting to get real. As I write, my husband and I are about to launch a campaign to collect money for our first serious short film, not only that, we are writing two screenplays for two different horror film festivals, we have sent another script to other major international festivals, and we also sent a low-budget short film we did with a couple of friends. In my photography career, I’m mastering the use of flashes and loosing my fear of working on photoshop, I was even able to do the teaser poster for our latests short, it may not be awesome, but it’s not bad. There’s a lot going on, we haven’t gotten any results yet, but I’m confident we will.